


Dadly Bonding Time

by galaxiestoexplore



Series: The Comfort AU [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Series of Unfortunate Events - Lemony Snicket, Supernatural
Genre: Adoption, Bars and Pubs, Blind Character, F/F, Healthy Parent-Child Relationships, Holy City Kids, M/M, One Shot, References to Alcohol, The Best Dads in the Universes, The White Dragon is a TARDIS metaphor because I'm a mess, crack ships, except Hans Hubermann who isn't here, i guess, i mean it's set in a bar so. it'd be weird if there wasn't, inspired by a weird conversation, just dads being dads, multifandom - Freeform, nobody's straight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-19 23:15:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9464828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxiestoexplore/pseuds/galaxiestoexplore
Summary: two wizardly dads walk into a bar...





	

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a conversation about which fict characters would make the best dad!
> 
> All characters belong to their respective creators, including my amazing friend sniperpilots.tumblr.com, who owns Baze and Chirrut's twelve children. The bar is mine though.
> 
> (If you can spot the (non oc) characters who aren't listed in the tags, you get bonus points.)

The bar with the blue front door was the only pub on the row without a neon sign in the window. Up and down the lane, as twilight chased lavender down into the horizon, sign after sign blinked on, flickering in the evening air.  
But none of the glowing tubes proclaiming "SAPPORO BEER" and "HAPPY HOUR 7-9" could match anything close to the brightness of the blue-doored bar’s windows.  
Despite the growing darkness, the light spilling out was bright as day, and (reflected off the snow on the sidewalk), just enough for passersby to discern the legend stamped in silver over the door: The White Dragon.  
The door handle itself— a coppery-colored affair— was scaly to the touch, and, in just the right light, appeared to be moving slightly.  
Inside the pub, a diverse bunch buzzed and bubbled, looking more like the members of a family gathering than the patrons of a fairly small establishment in a neighborhood known for alcohol.  
The friendly clamor echoed into the frosty street as the blue door swung open to admit two bundled-up men with snowflakes dusting their scarves.  
"Ahh, warmth at last," remarked the shorter one, pushing his scarf down to reveal a gently scarred visage. He carefully removed his coat and hat, hanging them over a sweatered arm. A quick brushing of his free hand swept off most of the snow.  
The larger of the two, agreeing gruffly, simply shook himself like a dog. Those sitting in the tables around the door cast him dirty looks, picking bits of ice out of their food and hair.  
"Bar?" asked the shorter one. The taller one nodded, snow still falling from his hairy coat and beard.  
Of the three open spots at the bar, two were together (next to another wild-looking pair of men exchanging quiet words.) The other, by itself at the opposite end, seemed to be smoking slightly. The snowy duo opted for the non-smoking barstools, and exchanged nods with their neighbors as they took a seat.  
The bartender's purple cloth scrubbed closer and closer on the marble counter, until her grin was focused on the short, scarred man and his wide, hairy compatriot.  
"What can I get you?" she asked, a friendly grin playing across her mouth.  
"Firewhisky," rumbled the wide, bearded man.  
"Make that two."  
"Coming right up," she replied cheerily, red hair swishing down to the back counter. The scarred man ran a hand through his dusty-brown coif. Silver strands trailed behind his fingers, looking out of place.  
"Maybe I should check on Harry," said the bearded man suddenly.  
His companion sighed. "He's fine. If it'll make you feel better, I can activate the surveillance spell, but it’s not going to tell us anything.”  
"I don' see why we couldn'a left a baby monitor," muttered the big man.  
The shorter man took a quick glance around before whispering, ”Muggle stuff goes haywire around magic, and you know there's a good amount of that around here.”  
"Not that much," said the larger man, a little too loud. The smaller man winced. "I'm jus' worried abou' the little tyke. We don' leave him alone that much..."  
"He's not really alone," sighed the other. "Tonks is keeping an eye on him. He'll be fine, Hagrid. At any rate, he’s old enough to take care of himself.”  
The bigger man—Hagrid— didn't look satisfied, but he turned back to the bar as the bartender returned, two overfull glasses sloshing in her filed-and-nailbitten-hands.  
"Here ya go, two firewhiskies!”  
“Charlie, could I have a refill?” called a woman from the other side of the bar.  
“Sure thing, Pegs!” she called back, already turning to the shelves.  
The more muscular of the fierce-looking men leaned toward Hagrid. "I heard you talking about your son? Harry? Would you like to see pictures of my children?"  
"Baze, nobody wants to see pictures of a stranger's children," said the slender man next to him. His white eyes seemed to both focus on nothing at all and stare right through his bulky companion.  
"Plenty of people want to see pictures of our children!" retorted Baze, unfazed, his cheeks ruddy but his mouth curving into a grin.  
"They really don't," replied his blind counterpart. "Stop harassing these poor men."  
"Actually, I think he'd love to look at pictures of your children," said the scarred man, giving his taller neighbor a significant look. "Wouldn't you, Hagrid."  
"O' course!" exclaimed Hagrid, his attention temporarily diverted from worry.  
"Well," said Baze, pulling out an extremely beat-up leather wallet stuffed with polaroids and printed photos (which he promptly spread across the entire bar) and taking a deep breath, "this is Beya... and this is Allie, and T and Q, and Peanut, and Lio, and Yasmin, and Ezzy, and Wrett, and Lucky."  
The scarred man's eyes were so wide that his eyebrows had ascended beyond his hairline.  
"I told you they didn't want to see the pictures," said the blind man in the silence that followed.  
"Shut up," said Baze.  
"No, no, these are lovely photos! You just have... a lot of children..." said the scarred man. "Hagrid and I just have Harry, and we aren't even— I mean, we’re just— it’s—”  
Hagrid wrapped a massive hairy-coat-covered arm around the smaller man's suddenly shaking shoulders.  
"'S alright, Remus. You don't have to talk about it."  
"No, I’m fine, it was so long ago—” the smaller man managed before his face paled and he shook his head.  
Hagrid pulled him into what looked like a rather wet hug.  
"I'm sorry," said Baze. "Didn't mean to cause any emotional anguish."  
"No, ‘e'll be fine," said Hagrid. “‘E's just overtired. Harry was 'is best friend's son. 'S a shame James isn't here to ‘elp raise ‘im. ‘E was a good man."  
There was a moment of silence in the little bubble that had formed between the four of them, as if the rest of the world was muted.  
Remus wiped his eyes. "I'm okay. Really, Rubeus.”  
"Our kids came from all kinds of situations too," said Baze quietly. "Sad stories don't have to stay sad."  
"And they won't," said Remus determinedly. “We’ll make sure of—“  
He cut himself off as a rather unsettlingly large black snake slithered down the counter toward him.  
"I'm so sorry! She's perfectly harmless, I promise!" shouted a man from the other side of Baze and his partner. He rushed out of his seat and carefully picked up the snake, curling it lovingly around his shoulders and neck. "Her name is Inkwell-- my son's decision.” he explained, smiling as he mentioned his son. “She’s not venemous, but I do hope she didn't ruin any of your photographs. Your children are lovely, by the way," he exclaimed, directing the comment to Baze, who beamed.  
"See, Chirrut? People do like seeing our children."  
Chirrut rolled his silvery eyes skyward.  
"Do you have pictures of your son, Mr—” asked Baze, turning back to the man. "I'm sorry, I didn't get your name."  
"Oh, of course! I'm Dr. Montgomery Montgomery, but you can just call me Monty. I'm very pleased to meet all of you," said the snake-holding gentleman, shaking hands with the four seated men and looking genuinely pleased to have interacted with them all. "And as for pictures, I can do better-- all three of my children are here. I know children aren't really supposed to be in bars, but they're very responsible and helpful with research, and quite I like having them with me. Since Miss Bradbury told me that she doesn't mind, I see no reason to leave them all alone in the apartment. Unless they wish to stay, of course.”  
"I'VE ALSO TOLD YOU TO CALL ME CHARLIE, OLD MAN," yelled the red-haired bartender from the other side of the pub. Evidently she had excellent hearing.  
"Of course, my lady," said Monty, tipping an imaginary hat before beckoning three children from behind the bar, where they'd apparently been sitting and reading books. "Come, children."  
The boy, who had neat dark hair and round glasses, carried a thick book, while his older sister (whose hair was tied up in a purple ribbon) carried a toddler (who was clutching a chewed-looking wood block.)  
“Did you want us for something, Uncle Monty?" asked the boy.  
"I hope you don't mind too much, but I was hoping to show you off to these kind gentlemen here. They were just discussing their own children, and seemed interested in meeting you."  
"Of course it's all right," said the girl with her hair tied back. She held a hand out to Hagrid. "I'm Violet Baudelaire, and these are my siblings, Klaus and Sunny."  
The three children politely made the rounds of handshakes.  
Chirrut commented, "They're beautiful kids."  
"You're blind," said Baze dryly.  
"I heard an 'Uncle'?" asked Remus tentatively. "Do we have more in common than simply being parents, or am I assuming too much?"  
"No, no, you're assuming exactly the right amount. I am not in fact a blood relative to Violet, Klaus, and Sunny; but after the adoption papers were all signed and approved, they quite kindly agreed to refer to me as their uncle and to allow me to call them my children."  
"Of course we did," said Klaus, pushing his glasses up on his nose. "You're miles better than our last guardian, and we love you." He blushed slightly at the last words, as if he wasn't used to saying them yet.  
Violet set a steadying hand on her little brother's arm. "He's right," she said.  
"Acquiesce!" shouted Sunny.  
"That means she agrees," explained Violet. Uncle Monty looked at his children fondly.  
"If you want to return to your studies, you may. Thank you, children."  
"Yep," said Violet, already looking a little vacant, as Klaus led her back behind the bar.  
"Good kids," remarked the bartender, who had come up behind them all. "Remind me a little of myself, although I'm not sure that's a good thing."  
“So how about you, Charlie? Thinking about getting some wee ones of your own?" enquired Monty, his eyes sparkling.  
"Oh, no," replied Charlie, shaking her head emphatically. "I'm totally satisfied with being the Cool Aunt… but I think the Boyfriends might be adopting. Every time I ask, they say they aren't, but I can read Cas like a comic book. An comic book who gets a wistful look on his face every time he sees a baby."  
Monty laughed, a deep infectious belly chuckle, and despite the fact that nobody else really knew what Charlie was going on about, soon they were all giggling.  
Klaus poked his head above the bar to see what was going on, then retreated back to his book.  
"So tell me more about Harry," rumbled Baze to Hagrid, and soon all six of them were thoroughly involved in a conversation about the best way to get a young boy to go to sleep. By the time they'd discussed how to identify if a child was gifted by age four; board games that wouldn't end in divided families and possibly a Third World War; and whether it was appropriate to paint large spiders in a baby's room ("Of course it is," said Chirrut. "You're blind," said Baze), it was rather late.  
"We need to get home," said Remus reluctantly. "It's not fair to ask Tonks to stay over for so long, especially when she lives so far away. And doesn't have a car."  
"I can drive her," said Charlie quickly. Remus raised an eyebrow.  
"I've got a car. And you all stayed here so late that it's time to close up anyway. Plus, from what I've heard about her, she sounds like a fascinating person. I'd love to meet her."  
"All right," said Remus mildly. "But she's essentially my little sister, so watch yourself."  
Charlie rolled her eyes. "I always watch myself. I'm a true gentleman. My flirting is always completely chivalrous."  
"Reassuring," replied Remus.  
Baze set about clearing all the pictures back into his wallet. On closer examination, Remus wondered if the holes in between the burn marks were actual bullet holes. ”You could help," said Baze to his husband.  
"I'm blind," replied Chirrut helpfully. "I can't see the pictures."  
"Oh, shut up."  
Monty gathered up his children's books, and escorted them, yawning, out of the bar and across the street.  
"I'll see you soon?" he asked the others as he made his way out. "We live quite close, so we're here often."  
"O' course!" said Hagrid, clapping Monty on the back hard enough to almost knock the man over. "We could bring Harry along next time."  
"It's still a bar," said Remus, laying a hand on Hagrid's shoulder and looking stern.  
"Yeah, but not any old bar. It's the White Dragon. Kid-friendly, snake-friendly, magic-friendly. Anything can happen, and anyone can get here," said Charlie. "From anywhere.”  
"Did she say 'magic'?" Chirrut muttered to his husband as they walked out.  
Standing in the snow, Remus slung an arm around Hagrid's shoulders. They waited as Charlie fished a key out of her pocket and fiddled with the lock.  
"You know, I was always worried about being a good father," he whispered. "But tonight... I feel more hopeful. Like we can really do this. Be successful parents"  
"O' course we can," said Hagrid, laying a massive hand over Remus'. "We love Harry. That's all you really need."  
"I suppose so," said Remus, and the three of them walked between puddles of yellow light towards the scratched brown minivan.  
Behind them, only the neon signs and the moon illuminated the dragon door handle on the now-dark pub's blue front door. In the odd lighting of night, no one could have been blamed if they thought they saw it wink.

**Author's Note:**

> This little ficlet isn't all!
> 
> sniperpilots and I had a really really long conversation about this AU, and we came up with a ton of ideas that we love, so... this is going to be a series! It'll be mostly focus on the kids, including a bunch more characters from Star Wars (the original films), Harry Potter, ASOUE, and Star Trek!
> 
> So if the concept of a high school where Violet Baudelaire, Leia Organa, Hermione Granger, and Pavel Chekov might all be in the same science class excites you... consider subscribing!
> 
>  
> 
> More info about Chirrut and Baze's 12 kids can be found here:  
> https://sniperpilots.tumblr.com/tagged/holy-city-kids  
> (or just ask sniperpilots about them, she'll be excited to tell you anything you want to know)
> 
> Thanks for reading! Leave us some comments and kudos if you liked it!


End file.
